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I don't think I'd have any respect for someone else who had as financially as easy of a life as I've had.
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But:
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I just don't see how someone who grew up being treated like trash and who wasn't really allowed to have an opinion or feelings is supposed to just magically have self-esteem
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Exactly!
As a child, you had advantages in some respects, but in others it sounds like you had a very rough time. Those rough times affect you now. They make things hard for you now.