So when I ended up with my bp dx I had never even been on an antidepressant. My choice of meds growing up was self medicating.
So my first real meds were bipolar meds. Inhatedcthe depression part but had a hard time getting the doc tobtry antidepressant
In the hospital I manipulated the doc to try prozac. That left me utterly unstable hypo and with massive auditory hallucinations. They were pleasant but I was not well. One night at 3am I decided to go kayaking alone and in the dark fundamentally out of it. Thank god my friend stopped me
Recently I began a new place where I convinced them try effexor. At first it seemed to work real well but now I feel it's making me much worse
I once manipulated a newbpsych nurse in the hospital to give me adderall right in the middle of a episode. Once I flew 80 ft more in the air and they had to give me a shot of hadol she didn't listen to me anymore lol.
That doc I was with so long may have had something right lol
It's hard for me not to be in control and I am not sure I trust doctors but I think I may give it a shot
My way is not working