Your mother sounds engulfing. Too involved, she wants to live her life through you.
To her you are still a child, part of her that she wants to control.

The fact you have (quite naturally) gone off and lived an independent life makes her feel rejected, insulted and indignant.

It's probably best if you don't have much to do with her. She wont change. IMO she has narcissitic traits. She cannot see beyond her own selfish needs.

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