It's not ludicrous if its the closest approximation you've ever had, and the best model you've got. Obviously its not the same as having a real parent but its pretty hard even for cute sweet children in foster care to find people to volunteer to be parents for them . as an adult you are screwed. If you repeatedly fail at adult relationships because you are driven by a difficult to articulate inner need rooted in childhoid you have to do SOMETHING. If you are self destructive because at your core you believe you are worthless and unloveable you have to do SOMETHING. My T has done a great job of helping me heal.those wounds though its taking time. At least my first response to any rejection is not to consider suicide anymore.

Those two things, acceptance and receiving a limited version of parental love are NOT mutually exclusive. In fact therapy usually consists of BOTH and for me the limited parent like love from my T gives me a safe place to return to when the pain of acceptance becomes too much. I mean I'm an adult. Instead of giving me fun baths as a toddler my mom tried to drown me and held me under til I passed out. I don't NEED anyone to bathe my now so of course no one will do that. I still however need to be reminded j deserve to be alive.

Why do people who say "just get it from real life" not aware that REAL LIFE ADULT RELATIONSHIPS, EVEN SPOUSAL ONES, NO MATTER HOW GOOD SIMPLY CAN NOT STAND UP TO THAT OVERWHELMING NEED. Its simply too much for people without T training. I know. I've wrecked relationships with it. Its easy to say "spread your needs out" but the deep.inner needs of childhood at least for me have never worked that way. They choose specific people to manifest with and then things get overwhelming and you end up retraumatized without understanding why.

There is a reason the T profession developed. Some of us from our early trauma have issues that are just too big for our adult relationships. And if no one ever modeled comfort, soothing, peace, love for you, you are stumbling around blind bloodying yourself on stuff until someone does.

Anyone In regards to the OP its a strange way to put it but I understand what she is saying. My only concern is that relationship can't be forced. So if you aren't ready to let down your walls, I don't know that your T lecturing you matters. She might just need to give you time