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This may be a stupid idea, but have you considered joining a gym or taking a martial arts class? I'm joining my boyfriend's judo class to help me let off a lot of the same bottled up anger and emotions that you've described.
Just an idea. I'm sorry you're going through this :/
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"When the people of the world all know beauty as beauty, There arises the recognition of ugliness. When they know the good as the good, There arises the perception of evil. Therefore Being and non-Being produce each other."
"Suffering produces perserverance; perserverance, character; and character, hope."
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