My mom passed away Nov 15, 2015 after a 9 year battle with breast cancer. My mom lived life to the fullest. She had a manner about her that made everyone in the room feel like they mattered. Over 700 people turned up to the visitation and funeral, including my pre-school teacher (I'm 38), and the parent of one of her students from 15 years ago. Very few people who ever met my mom ever forgot her. Mercifully, mom was only really sick for a short while.

Now I find myself irritable and angry almost all the time. I'm exhausted. On the upside I am still getting myself to work and eating.

I don't know what to do with these feelings or how to direct them. Right now hubby is taking the brunt of it. Everything he says annoys me. Thank goodness he's an incredibly patient man. We lost his mom after a 3 month fight against cancer a year and a half ago.

Is it dumb to ask; "how am I supposed to grieve?" What do I do with these feelings? To top it off this is my usual time of year to sink into a lovely depression. Getting out of bed is getting harder. I do things I know won't make me feel better. (Lying on the couch all day gives me a headache but I do it anyway)

I have an appointment with a counsellor but it isn't until March. They lost one of their counsellors and are hoping to replace her soon which should move the appointment up. I'm not holding my breath.