Thanks to all of you! I know you're all right, and that soon I'll be switching over to mania and that I'll be headstrong and determined again. But I also know that I'll ALWAYS wind back up HERE....in the depressive state and I HATE that! It's just the rules of the bipolar "game" until I find the right meds. And to do that, I have to find a Dr that's not a complete walking void! Believe me, I've been through countless Drs, pdocs, counselors throughout my life. Eventually I give up hope on THEM too! Sometimes I just feel like I'd rather stay at "the crash site" than to get too high and have to experience the fall over and over again. I just want off of this Damn rollercoaster!