Good job on your sobriety and plans for help! Stick with it and stay strong. I've had periods of stability and I'd say 2015 was one of my hardest times with instability. I was dependent on alcohol, started and stopped meds, lost a job because of it, went through detox, and then after I got sober I struggled hard and fell into one of my worst depressions because I didn't know how to cope with my emotions I felt without numbing it with alcohol. Then I got back on meds with a lot of trial and error. Tried wellbutrin, lamictal, (which both made me manic) and tons of other cocktails with no luck. I began rapid cycling so bad I couldn't even function. Then my pdoc put me on trileptal and that stopped my mood swings and cycling in its tracks. For the first time in a very long time I finally feel stable and great relief. I even started a new job last month! Now that I'm working , I'm also getting the best sleep I've had in ages. I've suffered with insomnia since I was a teen and still do take seroquel to sleep but now I'm sleeping through the night and falling asleep within ten minutes of hitting the pillow! I just hope that I stay this way! I do accept that I will probably depend on meds the rest of my life and chances are I will fall again but hopefully not for a very long time and not as hard! I want to say that night shift does suck so please make sure you are sleeping enough between shifts. I can't stress enough how important rest and mental health are. I never worked third shift and probably never will in fear of derailing but my bf does and he struggles often with exhaustion. So please take care of yourself and keep up the good work!