Thanks for the quick responses. I am glad I found this site. Junerain you asked to tell more. You know I don't even know how to start. When my parents died I saw such a horrible side to my family. I know things change but I was surprised at the characters of my siblings. The greediness over material things, the fighting and callousness. It was astonishing. And the ones that were doing it were so much older than I. When my mother was dying in the hospital a few of my sibling were out in the parking lot getting high every day for two weeks while my mother was slowly dying. That is how they were handling it. I was the youngest and they are twenty, twelve and seven years older than me. I was shocked. And then slowly as the years went by it got worse and worse. My twin who has been so angry, bitter and jealous of everyone but especially me has been so horrible. She is a severe alcoholic and has been a horrible mother. I would be embarrassed to even put the things she has done on this site. I have had to call Childrens Services to help save the kids. There was many a night that my daughter and I had to pick up the kids because she was on a rampage and locked them out. It is so sick. And she doesn't need alcohol to be this bad. It just intensifies it. And the other siblings also were very bad mothers. Men came before their children. It was sad the children had to raise themselves. And I always had to try to help the kids. I felt so sorry for them. Well my twin sisters boys are older now and do not want me to help anymore because they want to run wild and do whatever because they have no parents to watch over them. So they come and go and have no structure or home life. My sister is always drunk or doesn't care. It is so sad. And I am only touching on how sick it has all been. That is why I wanted to have someone to talk to. To get all these horrible sad emotions out of me. I am usually an upbeat person. I love my husband and daughter. They are great. But the last few years I felt like I was losing my self. And that I have to do something. So I thought seeing someone would help me. But this therapist was not the one I guess. How do you find another one? Just keep trying until you feel they are right? I almost feel creeped out telling them some of the things because I am so embarrassed of my family. They are sick. There was incest going on with my sisters ex-husbands new family and some of my family knew in April and never called to protect this poor child. As soon as I found out I called so it did not continue. And it was stopped. How could anyone live knowing that and not try to help. I guess I should stop now cause I could keep going and going. Thanks for listening.