I'm starting to keep it down to one short-ish phone call a week, since she gets very worried when she doesn't hear from someone more than 2 weeks. And go over there, maybe once a month or less. She already only makes a couple of short visits at my place a year.
I will not cut off all contact with her forever. I've thought that through and wonder if that would make me just as much of a narcissist. It's not always stressful when we get together, but when it is I use it as a challenge to see if I can find away to lessen the sting of her jabs.