MP, I had a different kind of abandonment, a never-great-to-begin with therapists team who became nasty and bullying when I tried to terminate. So I'd say they abandoned their professional demeanor and responsibility. And I didn't miss their bonds, so much as feel like a condemned , contemptible woman, like God had smudged me with his angry thumb.

In long time since, I've had to unravel many irrational reflexes the therapy installed--particularly the role play of me as the enfeebled, seeker and them as the magnificent and judgmental shamans. I had to picture them simply as people who went to school, got a degree and put on a performance. I continually try to dismantle the message that I'm so susceptible to wounding. I'm trying to see myself as strong and resilient, not a fragile flower that can be trampled who needs therapy rescue. (My roles as enfeebled, inferior and supplicating manipulated me into thinking I needed--more therapy.)

On reflection, my therapy was a Dumbo feather--they never gave me meaningful support. And I'm now fed by my own accomplishments and competence, not by the reassurances of the therapists. I demoted them, in others words.

All the best. I understand the hell. It does get better.