I can relate to your feelings very well. I was abandoned by a therapist decades ago. I never dealt with it until 3-4 years ago. I let it color how I lived my life for many years. In fact, I stopped living life. I hobbled myself together enough to get through a day at a time. My life was absulte misery, and enjoyed very little.

I hope it works for you going it alone. You might want to research therapist in your area in case things get out of hand, and you have to take who ever is available at that time without having vetted them.

I find psychodrama a good way to do the work of moving forward.

Good luck to you magicalprince.