I didn't know I also had BPD until my lawyer got my records for my SSD case! I was PISSSSSED. Some of the stuff they wrote about me was quite disturbing. Like finding out that a group of highschool girls are talking behind my back. That's how I felt. You asked why this year was severe and not last year. Dx's can change over night depending on your mental state. Plenty of days I've woken up and could tell I was in a mixed episode when I went to bed fine. It's the nature of the disease. There's no promises on how you will feel the next day when you're not stable. Before I started trileptal I was having mood swings so bad it was like flipping a light switch. Yea it's not fun. Don't worry about what they wrote about you then. What's important is how you're feeling now.