I found this site and decided that since I'm not ready to talk to a counselor, I would talk on here.

I am a recovering self-mutilator after four years of injuring myself. I went 9 months without a cut until now. But suddenly all of those old feelings are coming back. The emptiness, the panic, and the loneliness. I just don't know what to do anymore.

I'm so stressed out that it seems like any little thing can set me off and make me get that feeling like I have to hurt myself... I just need some support.

It's a never-ending battle
That takes place everyday
But when I'm asked about the pain
I'm left with nothing to say
Outside I am so happy
Giggling, laughing, and free
But inside there are demons
That just won't let me be
So I hide among the shadows
Searching hoping to find
A place where I can get some help
A place to ease my mind
But after an eternity of searching
Through the blackness of my soul
I am left farther, not closer
To finally reaching my goal
So I continue to cry
And I continue to bleed
So many scars left
For all the world to see
And still I hide among the shadows
Searching, hoping to find
A place where I can get some help
And finally ease my troubled mind.