I moved in with my boyfriend last February and we've been living together since then. Recently, last week actually, I came downstairs after getting dressed. We were heading to my aunt's because she invited us for lunch. He was reading some comics and started to shut down. I can't remember what exactly but there was a small problem with his laptop, it froze or something. A few weeks ago it fell really hard and the side got bent. I leaned over to check and he tried to hide the screen from me, so I leaned around to see why and I saw he'd been viewing some porn images. I asked him why and he said it was fun and shrugged it off.

I should mention that when I first moved in he deleted all the porn he had had previously and that recently I had gotten internet installed and bought a wifi router because our neighbour, his brother, was using their uncle's wifi and had some issues with them about the password. His wife doesn't work and doesn't really have anything to do all day because they don't have a tv or books or anything like that. The house was recently built and is still being worked on. So I installed the internet so she's have something to do at least.

Anyway, I didn't really take it seriously because I was a bit distracted and we were kind of late so I dropped it. But then a few times I had a feeling he was hiding something on his computer from me. I'd come into the room and get the impression that he'd closed or minimized something quick as a flash. So, one afternoon while he was in the shower I checked his browser history. He'd still been viewing porn. I didn't say anything. When we were getting ready for bed I asked if he was dissatified with anything and he said no. A few days later I checked his history again. Still more porn. This time I checked the downloading program I had given him. He had lost a few apps and needed them back. He didn't have to work that day but I did and I gave him the program. He'd been downloading porn with it. That afternoon I asked him about it. He lied at first but when I asked if he was telling me the truth he admitted it. I asked him why he lied and he replied "I dunno." I asked him not to lie to me again and he said ok. I then tried to explain to him about my view on porn watching and why I didn't want him to lie and he laughed and said he thought of it as a joke.

My arguement was that it was extremely easy to break someone's trust in you, especially if it was about something like porn. It would be so easy to go further on the internet. And I tried to compromise, I do realize that you don't have to be dissatisfied in your relationship to watch porn. I tried to compromise and asked him not to lie to me again, ever, about anything because it would seriously damage my trust in him. I honestly hate it when the person I'm supposed to be placing my trust in lies to me and hides things from me. This is in no way extended to my family, I'm not connected to them like I'm connected to my boyfriend but he still treated it like a joke and got annoyed with me, saying it was just a little porn.

I know it's just a little porn, but the thought that you want to watch someone else, some other woman have sex instead of having sex with me, makes me very very angry. I'm right there, and you've told me time and again that you don't need porn when you have me. And you've still gone and watched porn, what's worse, you've lied to me about it and hidden it from me. How am I to know if you've hidden something else or would hide something even worse from me? A few days later I said that to him after I asked him if he'd delete it if I asked him to. He did and when I tried to tell him how I felt he launched into this whole explanation about how it's a guy thing and and it didn't mean that I was inadequate and that even if he'd had some big beautiful movie star there he'd still want something more, and he'd rather watch some porn than go out and find some other girl. Really? How do you expect me to feel when you say something like that to me? There's some other woman, even if she's just an actress doing her job, in the space, in the times I'm supposed to be there, in your mind. And he expects me to accept it? Seriously just damaged my trust in him there. I could be overreacting, obsessive, possessive or whatnot, the ******* logic and reason is still there and I honestly don't feel comfortable around him right now and I can't stop dwelling on it every time he touches me. Other couples watch porn and accept it, because nobody ****ing lies and hides it. Its right out there in the open, and my trust issues be damned, I'd rather that than be ****ing lied to.

So, does anybody have any advice on how I can work this out with myself and him, or does it imply I need to resolve some issues and then see if I can carry out a relationship.