I'm still processing all of this, it was another one of those best sessions ever that included a huge connection feeling between T and I.

My mom finally admitted so much tonight. Here is a summary: 1) she, my dad and brother have been siding with my husband over me all these years. I knew this part but didn't know that my husband has been filling their heads that I am such a problem and he's the victim. They've all been going behind my back talking about me. Again, I knew this but to have it confirmed...

She admitted that she, dad and my brother have always blamed me for absolutely everything that is wrong in the world. I'm not 100% sure why this is so but it is.

Mom said later tonight that they all thought I was made of steal emotionally and they couldn't control me so they tried to break me. It worked but it didn't. I'm still fighting to get my life back.

She admitted that she has been jealous of me. That is why she raged towards me during my teen years.

T explained to her that his opinion is that I have been the family scapegoat and the 'identified patient'...I'll have to look this up but he explained it as they all believe that I'm the one who needs help and the rest of them don't acknowledge their part. In other words, everything would be better if I just fixed myself.

T was awesome! He did say this isn't about blaming parents or my husband because I 'bring a lot to the table' he said and chuckled. We'll explore that next session.

But he didn't let her continue to plow him with the 'I love my daughter', 'she's my girl'...routine.

He called her on something and I'm trying to recall it now. I'll have to think it over but he basically showed her where she was being contradictory. I felt so connected to him tonight. It was one of those moments that I realized, he does 'get me' and he does care about me.

My mom thinks she learned a lot and expressed that she wants to 'reverse the damage' as she put it. She never supported me but now she will. I hope so! She said so much clicked in her head.

Oh and she told me what a fabulous T I have...I knew that already. she also said, I wish I continue to see him, he's good. I thought to myself 'sorry sister, he's mine'.

There is a bit of sadness in me though. When I pulled up to T's office, I thought I saw a sale sign in front of his office. I was like but then I realized it was the house next door. I was so scared for a moment.

I have been getting this overwhelming sense that he's moving soon. I know, it wasn't his office this time, but I know he is moving one day out of state. He said it is years from now so I should relax but I can't. I actually had a weird feeling a few days ago about this same thing. When I saw the sign I froze and I got this sick feeling.

He has such an impact on me. When the day comes that he does move, I've lost my best friend. In fact some tears started tonight but I'm trying to hold them off.

I'm panicking over nothing at the moment, I need to remember that.