JustJenny, honestly, I think on the spectrum I do lean towards seeing porn as cheating. In other areas of the relationship, based on the common knowledge of how guys in my country act, I did actually get lucky. He does care about me and love me and we have fun but he does some things that I really, really hate. I tried to explain that to him, but when I get mad but I manage, which is extremely hard because I have a tendency to cry and run, to stay calm enough to try to lay out my reason for him to understand why I'm acting the way I'm acting it feels like he's throwing up a wall and I don't know if he's taking it in. Like the second time I tried to talk to him about the porn. He did that wall thing again. I don't know if he still thinks it's a joke and that he's some sort of idiot for putting up with it and allowing me to try to take something he enjoys away from him, to try to break his habit.