Out of curiosity, are you concerned about being open for fear she'll think you need a higher level of care? I ask because I was just talking to my T about this today. Ever since this one appointment in September, plus some late-night reaching out to both T and marriage counselor within less than a week, my p-doc suggested that maybe I needed a higher level of care and should do a day program (aka intensive outpatient program) for a month or two. Which would mean meeting with a bunch of strangers and not seeing T and MC for the period I was in the program. I went into a sobbing panic attack at the time--talked to T later that day, and she said she didn't think I needed that, so it was OK.

But since then, I'm scared to be honest with p-doc about things I'm feeling or have done. I was shaking during much of our appointment this past Friday, and she asked if I was anxious (duh, part of why I see her is panic disorder and generalized anxiety). T said that I need to tell p-doc that I'm scared of how she'll react to my telling her certain things and why. Because if I can't be honest with her, then what's the point, really? The thing is, my T and MC know me so much better than her, that they'd be better able to judge if I was really in trouble. Today my T said she rarely recommends hospitalization and was like, "If I committed every client who talked about x, then I'd fill up a whole wing of the local hospital." I think I need to trust that if p-doc was concerned, she'd talk to T and MC (all in same practice) before jumping to conclusions about something. Unless it was a case where a med she prescribed may have been causing something, that is.

Your stuff with your p-doc might be totally different, but just wanted to share...