
Jan 13, 2016, 11:34 AM
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Member Since: Oct 2015
Location: USA South
Posts: 507
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TerriLynn
My step son is 21 and lives with his girlfriend of 4 years. They have been living together for about 2 of those. She is 21.
SS works full time and makes ok money(about 2500 mth) for not being a college grad and being 21. His mother has spoiled him though, so he has a really hard time working and waiting to acquire the things he wants. He wants them NOW, and has a melt down when he doesn't get them. So he is driving around in a newer Nissan 350z, has several accidents so insurance is really high. His mother helped him buy it and he has a car payment. We (his dad and I), tried to convince him to get something where he wouldn't have a payment. But he gets what he wants.
SS and GF moved into a new apartment in August, his mother and her mother came down and bought them a whole apartment full of brand new furniture, and helped them get a very expensive apartment. The rent is $1000 mth, and in this area, this is really pretty high, they easily could have had a decent place for $700.
GF does not work. Well, she just started babysitting at home, 3 kids for $80 week! She is getting completely ripped off! She doesn't have a car and SS doesn't want her to have to walk to work, but there is a shopping center and restaurants right across the street. She could easily walk to a part time job over there and make a lot more than what she is doing. She just has no motivation to do anything. She has no interest in working at all. We mentioned to her probably a year ago, that she needed to get on the ball and get a job.
The last couple of months SS's mother has been helping them pay the rent, I don't know by how much, but yesterday she called DH and told him what was going on and asked that he talk to them cause she cant afford to keep paying the rent for them.
DH and I bought a new truck last month and were going to sell the little car we have, but thought it would help if we sold it to SS and GF for about half of what we could really get for it, that way she couldn't use the "I don't have a car" excuse for not having a job.
Saturday we are going to see them to give them Christmas presents, and we are going to talk with them about GF getting a job. We are getting really fed up with her not helping SS with bills and just living off of him.
Any suggestions?
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I haven't read the other answers so, sorry if this is similar. My suggestion is to stay out of your stepson's personal life. None of this is any of your business. Your husband (I think that is what DH means?) needs to tell his son's mom that she needs to deal with them directly if she wants to stop giving them money. You two do not need to be in the middle of this. Your stepson is 21, if he wants his gf to get a job he needs to talk to her about it. He does not need his parents to talk to her about it. You do not know what the two of them have discussed. It is none of your business what she does with her time or how much of the bills she pays, unless she asks you for money and makes it your business.
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Borderline PD/Major Depression/Anxiety
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