Well, I've had it. I've gotten to the point that I figure I'll write it down.

It's a long story, but my life has been a total joke of a waste. Every last situation I've been in wound up with me being screwed over, cheated, dropped, abandoned, tossed aside, laughed at, ridiculed. From day one I've been a human reject. I've never done jack sh** right, I've never been good enough. Winding up approaching 48, with no friends, no family, no life, crappy job, nothing but a mountain of debt and may as well be bankrupt ... haven't had a g/f but a couple times in my life, and laid=1, in my entire */** life. No one would have anything to do with me that wasn't a road ***** anyway, and even then I've gotten the cold blow off from low hanging fruit. My life is literally totally empty, and everything I've ever done to try to change that has become a giant terd thrown right back in my face. "fate" is that my baseline of life is one that is to be bad, and that "fate" is for it to only get worse, never better. A recently read story on psychology today about dogs in a cage being shocked resulting in "learned helplessness" hit the nail on the ****** head.

And this b/s about "talk to a professional"??? BEE ESS. "god", "therapists" ... like talking will change anything. Life is what life is, and the only thing "talking" or "praying" will do, is, try to wrangle into accepting reality. And the fact of the matter is, reality is life is a waste.