And that would be me. I pretty much blame myself. So what happened...I got bored of my marriage. Two years married and I got bored. And this is cheating online, not in person but it's still cheating. I'm fully aware of what I'm doing is wrong. I made a deal with myself to put an end to it on Monday and I'm putting it off. Okay, so what if I do? What happens if next time I cannot lie to get out of it? What if I really wanted to end my marriage to persue people I meet online? Sounds pretty stupid, doesn't it? As you can tell right now, I'm very tortured by this. I'm fully aware that both my wife and the one who I'm cheating on knows that something is not right. Neither of them know about each other but they know. I cannot deny the power of women's intuition.
Okay, knowing all of this, why cannot I come to terms with it in public? I made a first step talking to my family. The marriage I'm in started off as a long distance relationship. There wasn't much dating going on before we got married. I should have gotten out of it. Okay no more excuses.
Guys, sorry, I've grown a conscience. Cheating really does eat away at you until you get to a point where you feel that you cannot expose yourself anymore. It gets to a point where you just wait until you're found out. It's going to happen to me and I'm scared as hell. If I can get the courage to expose myself for the fraud that I am, I feel like I can get my life back in order.
...so that's what I need right now. How can I feel comfortable enough to expose myself as a sham? I know this is a tall order
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