I have to say my Mom has been kind of a jerk to me lately. When I first told her about my being bisexual, she actually took it pretty well. She even said something about me not having to label myself, and I was thinking things were completely fine. Then, for a while, she went into a bunch of stereotypical questions, basically thinking I'd be willing to sleep with anybody. She did kind of get past that luckily, but then she just started being a jerk about it. In an argument, she said some crude and nasty things to me about it. Luckily, she did apologize for that. However, she is saying that she feels that "male homosexual behavior" makes her uncomfortable. However, she insists she isn't uncomfortable with me, and she loves and accepts me as a person. She says she isn't going to be coolish with me or avoiding me, whatever I end up doing with my life. Today, she kept referring to it a choice. I called her on saying she's uncomfortable with me, but she said she didn't say that. She said she "doesn't want to be uncomfortable with me". Later, she says that the thought of that kind of "activity" makes her uncomfortable. Well, to put it bluntly........ then don't think about me ****ing! I seriously don't see why she should think about that. Seriously, as my mother, why does she need to think about that at all? Then, she keeps saying "choice". She keeps basically that I can make whatever "choices" I want without being shunned or ostracized by them. Well, that's good, but it's not really a choice. She also said today that she thinks that although it's true in my mind, there is some allure to the "drama" of it. That just really pissed me off unbelievably. However, she has repeatedly said this time and other times that she loves and accepts me regardless of all this.

Anyways, I explained that it's not a choice nor is it a pleasant experience for me. People say that being bisexual is like having the "best of both worlds". Well, that's not quite true for me at least. When you want to sleep with your friends, it's not fun at all. You find yourself stuck with this secret, and you can't really help it. It's no different with the opposite sex either, and whoever you are hanging out with, there's bound to be a weird sexual tension in the air. It makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable at times. Plus, there's the fear of judgment of others. I finally explained that. I finally explained this to my Mom, and she seemed to get it. She basically said that's she sorry that this has been "difficult" for me, but that obviously there's nothing anybody can do about it. Well, that was a relief and good that somebody understood my situation without flying off the handle at me However, she said that it doesn't change how she feels. Well, at least she's still here. I guess I can now say that somebody gets it and hasn't been freaked out by it to the point of running away from me She said that she doesn't really like talking about it though. Well, in a way, I can see that this isn't particularly a happy conversation for any parent to have. However, it's good that at least somebody actually gets it. She's been kind of a pain, but at least she gets what's going on without flipping out on me.