Quote:
Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster
Having a ****ed up abusive father is one thing in our society but when it's your mother?
People often don't believe you at all.
People seldom ever believe me about my mother, because on the outside you'd never know. She's charming as hell, polite, engaging, social butterfly, etc etc... but it's all an act. Underneath she's colder than ice and she has a unique flavor of sadism.
|
yes, when it is a charming mother, people do not believe the kid. That was my experience. My mother is charm to the max. She is very very popular and socially powerful in the city where she lives. And she did want to cause me to suffer. Not now. but when i was younger yes. She def. wanted to see me suffer. Did you know she was sick? Or did you believe her and blame yourself? I always blamed myself. Still do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster
How did I survive? Genetics(I'm also extremely tough minded and narcissistic), dissociation to the point of having Dissociative Identity Disorder, and sheer dumb luck to be frank.
I had zero support and I still have no support to this day. Both of my fathers were Narcissists and my family is so full of dysfunction it's incredible. I had to get myself out, because it was clear nobody was going to do it for me. Survival of the fittest is how it worked in my life.
I am in therapy right now but frankly I don't know how much good it's doing me.
|
I hope the therapy is helping some. Even if it is not obvious.
Guess it's a very good thing that you are tough minded. If you had a psychotic mother, narcissist fathers then makes sense that you live with DID. Was the way you survived. I am really sorry things were THAT horrible for you. No one to turn to.
I was highly dissociative but not to the degree of DID. Although some people did question if I was. I am not. My father was not an abuser. Just was too weakened. He just wanted peace at all cost. Wasn't a bad guy. Just had no way to protect his kids. So I was luckier than many. I didn't have 2 abusers. Just my mom. But she is VERY strong willed and was hell bent on wanting to mentally torment me, whenever she felt like it. And then somehow would always blame me for harming her. That was the pattern. Of course I would believe her that it was my fault. I still do. She is very smart and strong willed. I believed it was all my fault. Perfect storm. Her the abusive narcissist, me the empathic HSP. Bad combo. BUT believe me, there are many who had it much worse than I.