Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopelesspoppy
To all, with hope and compassion. We are all here/been there/will be there. Not one success story has ever been recorded of a therapist/patient attraction ending well. I would have rejected that idea myself a few years ago. The rawness, intimacy and vulnerability are heightened by the (usually) mutual attraction, it was intense for me, he spoke of giving up everything to run away with me.
Now, finally, I am relieved. Hurt and scarred, traumatized and lonely. But beyond the point of going back into the quagmire that ruled far too much of my world for way too long. Not happy, far from content.
Please do not read this and consider me a bitter victim, anything but. I knew better, or so I would like to think.
Feeling validated and understood can be far too seductive and many therapists see an opportunity to satiate their own narcissistic egos; and often they don't even realize it. That is why I will not take action. A dear friend is having great and healthy results with him.
He got spun up in his midlife crisis and I think it dovetailed with mine.
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Yes, I don't think T's generally deliberately do harm. There are just so many ways they end up rationalizing behavior that is clearly not meant to be happening. I guess quagmire is a good word. It's like, because of the practical restrictions on communication that therapy imposes, when communication does happen it can get out of control and all the things that weren't communicated start to consume you and spin this narrative that you get wrapped up into.
I really forgot, until recently, what it was like to have my head above water. Funny that all the stuff about the importance of healthy therapy only starts to really make sense after you have experienced unhealthy therapy running its course.
So, there's something really refreshing about feeling in control of my life again. Even in the enfeebled state I was left in...
Sorry about the situation with your friend though.
That has got to be so confusing. I don't know.