REmommy, you married him so vows state for better or worse. If he wants you involved on that level you both should be in a therapist office. There should be some insiders that have that job already. His first therapist should of kinda been that for him, although once he got up on his research he would have picked up on what was happening. At least I did, because I read of lot of research papers and stuff. I would have quickly got that part in and the only thing they could do was talk through. Since you are his wife I would try to do that under the guidance of a therapist, but the vows say for better or worse.