Wow. He sounds rly challenging.

Welcome to PC and the rainbow of points of view here. Hope you enjoy it and find lots of good input & ideas.

OK: I'm a female Aspie, so the male point of perception is no doubt different. However, am the mother of 3 kids and 2 out of the 3 also have Asperger's, with son being the most deeply affected. His stuggles somewhat parallel your GamerBoy's behaviour.
When dealing with RK (son), things have to be very concretely stated. Not "Call me sometime tomorrow" but "call me between 9 and 10 tomorrow; I won't wait any longer than that." Not "I'll see you this weekend" but " Will you be home Friday at about 1, bc that's when I'd like to bring the baby gift over."

I've heard it said that "time means nothing to an Aspie", and even w/me I admit sometimes that's true. It sounds like your guy's boundaries and expectations are all over the place! How frustrating for you! Boy do I sympathize, sigh.

My opinion only, but: Your GamerBoy is not playing nicely. Unless you're prepared to firmly state and firmly enforce every expectation and defend every reasonable boundary, I'm afraid your feeling will continue to be trampled upon. He's really sounding oblivious. So sorry he's got you confused & conflicted. The very best to you.
xo, Chyia, smh at these guys w/all their gamings lol (and I don't mean just on the consoles!)