It just sounds like some harmless fantasy hon. We can take a little feeling and attach an emotion to it, like a young one in puberty is sexually sensitive...after all, that's all we think about then. We can then take this fantasy and use it as a tool in our mental sex tool box.

It also sounds like there might be some self-esteem issues and that we are using this tool as a crutch to perform when maybe this crutch can be the source of awkwardness?

If this is bothering you, since it's mental, just quit using it and it will go away.

This is all speculation of a possibility. You would be better suited consulting a specialist in said matters. Good luck!