Yes, you do. You DO want to live. I know there's this place, however small, inside you/your soul/your being that holds hope that things will change for the better. I know this place exists because I know it exists within myself. During my lowest of points in life, where I wanted to neglect myself, to curl up in a ball in some dark room and cry till I die, to shut myself out from the world, this place didn't stop from giving me hope that there would be brighter days in the future. Hang in there, don't do anything irrational or hasty, and seek someone to talk to.