Quote:
Originally Posted by hopealwayz
Recently, my T was going to terminate me. Then, he decided to give me one more chance with the agreement that he was going to write me a set of rules. He gave me 2 pages of very rigid and tightly suffocating rules that I feel takes away my trust, safety, and freedom to open up. Also, he said that he will be the one who decides what we discuss in sessions and I don't have any input. So what I want to talk about doesn't matter.
I think that countertransferance is playing a part in this but he won't acknowledge that idea.
I want to stay with him.
However, I decided that I'm going to take 2016 off from him and go back at the beginning of 2017 to see how things are then.
I think he just needs time and space from me.
It's all so confusing.  |
Quote:
Originally Posted by hopealwayz
I'm hurting so badly. I really don't even want to live anymore. I have no hope for the future. I just go through the motions and put on fake smiles for the world.
On top of my painful life situation, the T who I thought would not abandon or hurt me, has emotionally abandoned me. He once said that he'd never give up on me. But he has.
Where did all the compassion go?
Am I really that bad of a person? |
A 2-page letter of rules you must comply with? You have no say in the discussion topics? UNACCEPTABLE!! Seems ludicrous to me for a t to exercise his power of control over you in such a demeaning, demoralizing way.
You need to drop this fool like hotcakes permanently. Straight away. Given your painful life situation, and the added pain brought on from t, you should get online this weekend and search out a new t. Can you get a few names and numbers lined up so you can make phone calls first thing Monday morning? You need a t and there are plenty of good ones out there. This jerk of a t doesn't deserve another second of your time.