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Lemon said:
When T and I were talking about this I think she was trying to get me to agree that getting the anger out might be better than feeling depressed. When she asked me if feeling angry felt worse than being depressed she seemed a little surprised when I said 'yes'. We think this is because I have so little experience with anger

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Hmmmm, I think we may be clones. Feeling depressed also feels better to me than being angry. It kind of surprises me your T would be surprised by that. Is it that unusual to feel that way?