Maybe you are better off without him, but I'd hate to see you lose your kids like that. I think it will come back to bite him over time though. What he did isn't right. I think I am more stable if I don't have to deal with a male in my life. Maybe you would be too. My Ex was a big contributor to my emotional problems and then he judged me for them. A family is an ecosystem, everyone contributes to the chaos and dysfunction in their own way. No one person is totally to blame, but he seems to be making you the one to blame. I'm sorry you're going through this. At least I don't have any kids with mine.