I was with exT consistently for a little over a year. I never cried in front of her until my last 3 sessions when she was terminating me. I talked about very sad things but couldn't. I could cry in her waiting room and right as I was walking away but not WITH her. I also had anxiety before my sessions. I now think that I was too wound up to let go. I wanted to cry so badly with her because I thought she would finally see how much pain I was in.

I cried with new T. the very first session and probably have half of my sessions. I don't have anxiety before seeing her and I find it much easier to let the feelings come up. She can just talk about nothing and, if the feelings are there, they come up and out. So, I have concluded that I never really felt safe with exT. I wanted her to be and wanted to believe she was safe, but I think my body was telling me otherwise. In the end, it was safe because we were ending the relationship and I guess I had nothing to lose.