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Jan 26, 2016, 12:43 AM
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Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: Missouri
Posts: 9
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I've had 5 surgeries since June 22nd. They are all in the same hip - I went in for a hip replacement and it went haywire. I had to have corrective surgery before they even took the stitches out, and then more corrective surgery a few months after that, followed a week later by a staph infection. About 6 weeks after that, another surgery, this time they removed all the hardware they had installed, and left me wheel chair bound, with no hip bones. And now I have to go back to have the infection cleaned out again. (It doesn't want to quit!) They have measured me for a hip that is specifically designed for me, and I had hoped that would my next and final surgery.
No such luck. So why am I saying all this on a chronic pain page? Because I have not been out of pain since June 22nd, when they did the first surgery. During some of the longer times between surgeries, I have whittled down the pain killers to a point where I only have a few a day, and can live with the amount of pain I have the rest of the day. Only now I have surgery again, in the exact same spot they have cut open the last 5 times, they still won't be putting in a new hip, and I'll be headed to a nursing home wheelchair bound with still no hip bones, until I am recovered enough to come home to my cat and an aid a few hours a day.
My brain is screaming inside that "I can't do this again!!!!" Yet I know I really have no choice if I ever want to walk again. So I'm resigned to the surgery. What I can't resign myself to is the pain being out of control, and the pain meds prescribed also being out of my control. And when you go from the hospital to a nursing home (3-4 days after surgery) the nursing home never has your pain meds waiting. I had to go 48 hours at one place, just waiting for pain relief.. I'm so very tempted to bring my bottle of pain meds from home, hidden away, for those times when either the nursing home nurse has decided that she'll wait till she does night rounds (in 2 hours) and give you the meds then, or they run out, or they decide that just because you were sleeping, you aren't in pain, or any other of a number of rehab center/nursing home reasons that boil down to me, left laying there, in pain.
No, I won't bring the meds. I'm responsible. But God, WHY DO I HAVE TO DO THIS AGAIN????? 
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That which does not kill me makes me stronger.
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