First off are a few things about myself:

I'm divorced for a number of years.
I am opposed to having a platonic relationship with a man (I am female), therefore I have not had any men-relationships since my divorce.
Recently, I've come to this: I would like to have a relationship within which I can trust deeply. That having a trusting relationship wherein I can share the deepest parts of me (wihout fear) is of great value.
So when my friend suggested I meet her dh's friend I said, hey you never know.
My intention in meeting with him was to find out for myself whether he and I are a match for marriage. Not for a platonic relationship.
So he and I met. I enjoyed our time spent together and he says he did too. We made up to meet again.
He is aware that I am only 'dating for marriage' and he says he is too.

I left the date with a feeling of FEAR. Fear that the person in front of me may not be showing his true colors. That we may end up married and I may see parts of him that I won't see while we are dating. For example, a temper. I am so scared.
I don't want to develop a deep emotional attachement to him and then have my heart broken.

This fear of us eventually getting married and things not working out....drives me insane. We both have kids and I'd hate to make our kids go through another divorce.

Any ways to ensure my nightmare doesn't happen?