Huh! Jess, I thought that I wouldn't be playing their game if I stopped giving. That's exactly what I plan to do. Next time they want something, "Sorry! No can do!" But they've got the leverage; the kids. No money, no kids. My DIL is definitely manipulative... and sneaky! Don't know if my son knows it yet or not... or will admit to it. It's probably going to take some time. It took me 11 years to figure out my ex was manipulative and mentally ill! Oy vey!