thanks KD. shes so good with words and feelings though. tends to cope really well.
ive recently realised its weird for me when someone has something going on and doesnt expect or even let me be there for them. im so used to my closest friends doing that constantly. maybe thats what it is. she has something going on and has other people she leans on instead of me.
from the place im in now it seems easier to believe shes gone.
think i ll set a vague limit for myself - say a week - where i dont have to believe she s gone. i can have hope maybe she ll come back. then if i hear from her that hope can keep be renewed a little and if she doesnt. well i can deal with that then and not now.
i still feel crap though. but what else is new
thanks KD. i appreciate the post.