Hi, I’m new. I hope this is the right place for me to be. I find I don’t identify with a lot of the experiences I've read in other places online, and am wondering if there’s anyone else here like me.

I’ve been an overeater since childhood. Literally for as long as I can remember. I remember coming home from elementary school and bargaining with my mother on what my afternoon “snack” would be, and then sneaking a full can of soup.
I remember being young and sneaking to the fridge on a regular basis to steal food in small, consistent chunks.
I remember needing to choose my own pieces of meat, instead of just eating what was presented to me, and I remember my sister making a joke I was pregnant when i got caught getting something to eat.

I am 30 now. I binge on a weekly basis, and I hide in my room to eat so my roommate can’t see me. I sneak to the kitchen often. I eat until I’m uncomfortably full, but I will finish whatever is in front of me. Sometimes I’ll think about ‘what I’m gonna eat later’ all day. Throughout all of this, never have I ever purged. I just eat. I feel a lot of shame about my bingeing but I just can’t seem to change my habits. If i’m really motivated I can go almost a month without bingeing, but that’s as far as I’ve ever gotten. I always slip back. I have been going to therapy for a few months now, but I have not talked about my eating habits with her yet.

I absolutely hate having this little control over food. I hate that I can’t just be happy with a properly sized meal. Even if I eat one, I’ll just go back to the kitchen later.


Is there anyone else who’s been overeating since childhood? I feel like an anomaly.