thanks for sharing KD. i totally get what you re saying because i do do the same thing a lot. guess im not the only one so i need to remember that.
i didnt mean to imply i felt left out at thinking she would turn to someone else for support rather than me. just that thinking about her doing that (and some other stuff a while ago) makes me realise that thats what im used to friendships being built on to a certain extent. them coming to me to complain and look for advice, support etc. im realising thats not healthy and the idea of a friendship (with this particular friend or not) where im not my friends immediate crisis manager is intriguing. and unnerving i guess.
i have asked this friend for a LOT of support since ive known her and it got to a point where i felt so guilty i felt i needed to restore the balance a bit and shift the focus more onto her and her issues. also because i really do love her and i want to know because i care. but maybe that trying to shift the balance was the wrong thing to do... i dont know. maybe by doing that i made her feel pressured to talk to me when, as you say, she might be in a place where she has no words and is 'meditating' on her own issues. (i like your use of that word.)
i just suck big time at relationships. especially when im not the one whos emotionally in control. im am so screwed up. lol.
((((((((((((((((((Kimmy)))))))))))))))))))))))))
thank you again.