Dustin,

I think it's great news that you've found T who genuinely listens to you & understands your point of view. It's such a blessing to have someone like that on your side as you're trying to get better. After having bad experiences with your previous T's, I bet it's difficult for you to open up & trust her -- but it sounds like you're doing great so far! Don't be scared... keep trying, and let her help you.

Dunno how everybody else feels about this, but I think it's only natural to feel super-close to your T when she/he is really good. I've got a special bond with my T, and I feel like she understands me better than probably anyone else. I've never actually experienced the sexual attraction side of it, but I can certainly see how that could happen. If it continues to bother you, do you think you could just bring it up with her straightforwardly? Chances are, this has come up for her before, especially if she is attractive. I know it would be kinda awkward to talk about, but she is a professional & probably knows how to deal with these kinds of issues. Use your own judgement, of course, but I was just thinkin it'd be better to get it out in the open & deal with it so that it doesn't become a big roadblock to your therapy.

You're not crazy or a bad person for having these feelings, I promise. You deserve happiness & to feel better!