I'm sorry you were abused like that by someone you went to for help. I'm glad you have found the therapist you're seeing now, he seems like a wonderful human being who really cares about you, which you definitely deserve.

I've only ever been abused verbally, but I understand shame. I was told for nearly three years in school, when I was a teenager, by almost every boy in my class (the girls bullied me as well, but they said other things). I hate looking at myself in the mirror, and at 27 I'm still a virgin because I feel so hideous I can't stand the idea of putting it out into the universe that I think anyone would ever find me attractive. I really don't want guys to look at me. I'm bisexual, and the idea of going out with another woman seems less frightening, though not enough to actively seek out dates or whatever, but a man? No way. Please don't even look at me. I know I'm unattractive. Just pretend I'm not here.

I understand wanting to sleep for a very long time. I have started doing this thing of rejecting days if I don't want them. If I wake up, and the very idea of existing seems unbearable, I just decide to reject that day. I declare it a non-day and go back to sleep. It's probably not the healthiest coping mechanism, but it seems better than many other alternatives.

Take care of yourself.