You are NOT gross. I think sometimes people just don't know what to say. I can't speak for everyone, but I know I chose not to comment immediately because I became so overwhelmed by anger at your ex-T I didn't know what to say that was about supporting YOU instead of expressing MY anger. I still don't really know what to say.

I think you should continue to share your story if you find it helpful. Everybody copes in their own way, and some people don't feel much of a need to talk, but I've personally found that shame has a tendency to fester in the dark; that unless exposed to light, to air, and to reason, it grows large and monstrous.

I don't think you're gross. I don't think you're to blame. As a matter of fact, I've always enjoyed your posts; you strike me as kind and good despite having endured what strikes me as one of the most cruel and evil betrayals imaginable.