another part i am extremely ashamed of is that i knew he was married. i knew he had 2 kids. i knew he had a family and wife and kids that love dhim and here i am being a homewrecker. he got divorced after everything came to light. thats hard to deal with. with the thoughts that i ruined his life.

sometimes i am angry at myself, that ruined his life. that i did seduce him in some way, brought it on myself. one night we were sitting on his couch in his office on opposite ends and our legs were intertwined. i asked him, "do you wish you never met me?" he said yes. ill always remember that. because it mad eme feel like it was me , it wa smy fault.

sorry im writing so much i dont have an outlet right now and i dotn wnat to do something unsafe