I was a regular on this site a few years ago, but I forgot my username so I had to start over. I need some ideas for overcoming my own weakness and depression. I've sunk low enough into the hole that I don't want to get out any more. I am aware that it is my own choices and reactions to situations that have put me where I am. I seem incapable of saying no or standing up for myself or going after what I want. Instead I am just wallowing in worthlessness and weakness. I feel like I can't be anything but what I am...which is weak. Although I'm taking my zoloft, my depression just keeps hitting me harder and harder. All I really want to do is sleep and read fiction. Then I find myself identifying with the characters, which is just not realistic. I'm not really a stupid person, or at least I didn't used to be. I have a master's degree and I used to be ambitious, but after years of getting knocked down, I've given up. I just don't see the point anymore because the results are always the same. I lose because I'm weak because I don't demand anything for myself. Usually, I don't even ask for anything....lately, I wish someone would just put me away in a mental hospital, but I'm not in bad enough shape for that so I just keep wallowing in my own weakness and beating myself into a bloody pulp.