My take on this issue is a little different. My T has both said these exact kind of things, sometimes they irritate me, sometimes they don't, but I notice that I have all kinds of negative reactions (from time to time, not constantly, and I've seen her for 5 years) to not only what she says, but what other people in my life say. Especially my wife, who is amazingly supportive and fascinating most of the time.

But for me I have found that trying to change what people say-- even T's, although they can be better at it than others-- is really not very useful to me. Instead I've shifted to thinking about my own reaction and understanding that better. The result of this is I am more accepting of what people have to offer me (verbally) and this has opened up my world and opened up my relationships to new places. So one way to have this conversation with your T is:

"So, T, I have noticed a couple of times that when you say "XYZ" I have this negative feeling of [irritation, anger, whatever] and I'm curious about what that's about for me. Can you help me explore this and make sense of it?"

I think that framing any issue you have with a person as your reaction (as in you owning it) as opposed to pointing your finger and saying "you do this wrong" almost always results in a better conversation. And at least for me, I in the past have tended to label things I don't like as the other person's problem, not mine. Please note that I would excuse from this analysis anything that is abusive. But most of the stuff people say, including T, is not really the problem. It's that I have a negative reaction to something that isn't negative per se, but it impacts me that way.

But I'm trying to become more open as a person. I have a long history of CSA and most of the result of that was to close myself off as an adult, to pretend to be something other than me, and (later) to try to control what everyone said and did around me. And while I've had a certain amount of success asking people to do and say differently -- for them to change because I've asked them to, it's worked better for me to change my perspective that most of the things that bother me are really mine to work out, not to ask the other person to change. Because trying to change other people rarely works. Your loved ones will often try--- like there is nobody who knows me who tries to sneak up behind me and "surprise" me anymore-- not even my own children. It used to bother me when my T would wave her hands around too vigorously, and I noted that it made me kind of dissociative. She offered to sit on them and I was like, that's really nice of you but you don't need to sit on your hands for me. I want to feel more comfortable with you flailing your hands about. I know you're not trying to hit me or otherwise mess with me, so this is my issue to deal with.