thought i was doing okay. today i feel really down again. saw my pdoc and picked up daughter, couple of errands with the 2yo. idk i just felt like this is it. one day hubby will leave me because i'm not good enough and why should he stay married to me and support me when i am such a mess and don't even do a good job at wife and mother. dinner is hot dogs with no hot dog buns. mess from the kids is on the floor because i am too tired to pick it up. i procrastinate on the kindergarten registration, the tax return. i just feel no good. my daughter tells me she doesn't like my hair i should cut more of it off. i just cut it again monday and it looks like crap. i need a thicker skin. i need a friend. i need to be a better role model for my daughter who is starting to understand more and more. i don't want her to be ashamed of me when i pick her up at big girl school. i know this is self-generated negativity but these are my fears. this is my anxiety. and there isn't really a reason why it wouldn't happen. i do not feel strong enough to stop it. it's like a downward spiral.

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