Valentina,

I have to say that I respectfully disagree. How is my married life a lie? You see, I didn't choose to be gay, I didn't choose to fall in love with her...but knowing I'm gay, I chose to marry her and I chose to have a family with her. And whether she chose to accept my sexuality or not all of these years...she chose to marry a gay man and she chose to have a family with a gay man.

I have been very open about my sexuality all of the time we have been together, and perhaps I avoided labelling myself as a way to protect her and my family. But now is a point where if I don't do something related to my anxiety...I will lose myself and my family with lose me too.

So there is no lie, and the truth was always there...just no one wanted to look it straight in the eyes. No...divorce is not answer...moving away is not answer...that is only avoidance of the anxiety. I have not stopped loving her and asserting that I am gay will not change my feelings and attractions to her. I think too many people believe that if you aren't satisfied in your pants, you can be satisfied in your life...and that's the real lie people are telling themselves.