Valentina,

I do respect your right to your opinion, but you are reinforcing my point that too many people are focussed on stereotypes. The majority of those seem to be gay/lesbian people who almost seem to be "protecting" the label of gay. How many times have I heard "you can't be gay if you have any attraction to your wife"? Too many!

It's funny because my therapist just so happens to be gay as well. She and I were talking about my anxiety and my intent to come out to my wife. She referred to her own coming out as "a more traditional" process. We've gone from gay people hiding their sexuality completely to now having gay marriage legal in many places in the world, and a gay person referring to their coming out as "traditional".

Yet here you are essentially telling me that I a living a lie, pretending to be something I'm not. Sure from your perspective it seems odd to be a gay man married to a heterosexual woman. Even I know that it is "non-traditional" or not stereotypical. Please understand that I know I am gay...I was gay long before I met my wife. I know I fell in love with my wife...that is a fact and yes I do partake in heterosexual intimacy. You know what...I don't care about labels for this exact reason, because other people want to put one on me, or tell me I can use another label. So labels aside, please do not tell me that I'm living a lie or pretending...you are not me....I know my feelings and I've spent years ensuring that I am not fooling myself.

So please, unless you have something constructive or positive to contribute, I would kindly request that you refrain from making statements that call into question the validity of my statements. Your opinion has been noted. Thank you.