AWWW Inky. Don't be hard on yourself. Your feelings are real and very valid.

I agree with what has been said here. Stress can do such unexplainable to our thought process. Yes we need stress, but there is always a point of too much.

I would never think you are a violent person, but I do feel that this can be a natural reaction to things that are going on. I have felt like taking others heads off, and I am also the opposite of this. But depression, stress, illness; it can do this.

Just reading what you wrote about taking pills, purging..... this will make it worse. Not that I am one to speak, but I know what you are going through. I don't know exactally how you feel, nobody can but you. But I do have an understanding with everything u are saying. I wish I could turn the switch, help with the more positive ways of coping. lolol....but unfortunetly I cannot. My magic powers are on hold.

Just remember that you are not a bad person, or that this is not normal thinking. If there is something I have learned is; our feelings are ours, we own them, and they need to be validated. Our thoughts are also ours to own. Its just working through these.

If you feel that you get to the point where the thoughts are taking over, get help, RIGHT AWAY. Try not to harm yourself with pills or purging....or anyway for that matter. But if it does happen, well we will help you through this. Slipping is not bad, its what we can do in the future. Not thats its easy!!!!! Time...give this to yourself.

I am here, and many others as well. Talk to me anytime, I worry about u. But I have seen who inky is, and your wonderful. I care about you, your part of my "good" family; lolol.

Love you dearly!!!!

Justy