Thank you Random. Sadly I have been coping with this for 30 years....and my coping strategies have now,resulted in my mind failing. Without actually addressing the anxiety...and avoidance is no longer feasible....I will continue to lose my ability to make and access memories, lose my ability to process and solve problems, and lose the ability to focus and follow conversations. I would end up losing my ability to work, converse and think. You see, this isn't just about some butterflies in the stomach when some of my homosexual aspects rise to,the surface...this is about losing myself. And if I lose myself....where then in my family. At least by coming out....my family and I have some choice as to where we go.