Thanks.
Im seeing two therapists. one every week and one once a month. i have only one friend which i see every week on sundays but i got quite fed up with her too. i didnt see her last sunday. yes, i guess its all about what i hate less.

at this very moment i just hate being alive. i hate waking up, feeling, thinking, being present, working and doing nothing at home and having no one that im glad to see and nothing that im glad to do. i have lost every interest or enjoyment in things. the only thing i wish i could do is cry and running away from life. i cant believe my life has turned out to be like this.

Im scared to live each and every day